29: How to Have a Secret Affair

Mar 24, 2021

Here’s a glimpse of what you’ll learn:

  • Nikki S. describes her marriage and shares her reasons for having an affair

  • Nikki talks about feeling rejected after expressing her sexual desires to her husband

  • Nikki’s experience starting her secret life on Ashley Madison

  • The screening process that Nikki employed while using Ashley Madison and how she protected her anonymity

  • Why Nikki decided not to pursue other options with her marriage

  • The importance of honoring your own needs

  • How to set emotional boundaries—and what happens when they don’t work

  • Nikki shares her tips for how to stay safe while having a secret affair

In this episode…

Most people would agree that your partner can’t fill every role in your life, but what happens when they’re unwilling to explore your sexual desires? If you love your spouse and don’t want to break up your family, do you simply accept going without and learn to live with suppressing your sexual needs?

After spending years repressing her sexual desires and coping with feelings of rejection in her marriage, Nikki S. concluded that it was her responsibility to fulfill her own needs. So, she decided to start a “double life” and seek sexual fulfillment elsewhere. But, before pursuing a secret affair, Nikki made sure she was clear on her goals and had a strong safety plan in place.

Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Nikki S. to discuss the risks and rewards of having a secret affair. Nikki describes the emotional toll of being rejected by her husband, the empowerment she felt when starting an affair, and what happens when the emotional boundaries we set for ourselves don’t work. Plus, Nikki offers some practical advice on protecting your anonymity and staying safe. Stay tuned! 

Resources Mentioned in this episode

About Nikki S.

Nikki S. is an executive in her public life and a self-described affair-hungry slut in her private life. Although she’s been happily married for more than 10 years, Nikki seeks sexual fulfillment that her husband can’t provide. Instead of ending her marriage, she decided to create her own erotic playground elsewhere.

Sponsor for this episode...

This episode is brought to you by Marie Murphy PhD Relationship Coaching.

Dr. Marie Murphy provides shame-free, blame-free, and non-judgmental relationship coaching. She draws from different philosophical traditions and approaches in order to better understand the human condition and the different types of professional assistance that can be germane to people in complicated relationship situations.

To learn more about her and her relationship coaching practice, visit www.mariemurphyphd.com today and schedule an introductory coaching session with Dr. Marie Murphy to begin the process of resolving your infidelity situation in a way that's truly right for you.

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