28: When You're the One Who Cheats with Dr. Tammy Nelson

Mar 17, 2021

Here’s a glimpse of what you’ll learn:

  • Dr. Tammy Nelson discusses why affairs can be so exhilarating

  • The brain chemicals that are released during a new relationship and how they affect the way we perceive situations

  • What are the phases of recovery for a relationship after an affair?

  • Dr. Nelson explains how couples can redefine monogamy after cheating

  • Why do people lie, and what happens when they are confronted about it?

  • The parts of an affair are the most difficult to recover from

  • Dr. Nelson’s advice for anyone who is cheating

  • The lessons Dr. Nelson learned from being on both sides of an affair

In this episode…

Affairs can be intoxicating, but they can also leave you feeling confused and ashamed once the excitement wears off. So, why do people cheat, and what makes an affair difficult to end? And, once you’ve been caught in your lie, how can you salvage your relationship?

A lot of the answers for why we do what we do can be traced back to the chemicals flooding our brains. Much like being under the influence of a drug, our chemical response to a new or elicit relationship can make it difficult to see things clearly—and it can take time for the reality of a situation to fully set in. However, according to Dr. Tammy Nelson, even if you’ve cheated, you still have plenty of choices for how to move forward. As she suggests, there are ways to rebuild your relationship in the aftermath of an affair, but you may need to start with a whole new foundation.

Join Dr. Marie Murphy in this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me as she sits down with Sex and Relationship Expert, Dr. Tammy Nelson. Together, they discuss why affairs are often so exciting, the brain chemicals that influence how we interpret new relationships, and the importance of revisiting your monogamy contract after someone cheats. Plus, Dr. Nelson offers scientific insight into why people lie and provides advice on what to do if you’re the one cheating. Stay tuned.

Resources Mentioned in this episode 


About Dr. Tammy Nelson

Dr. Tammy Nelson is a sex and relationship expert, an international speaker, an author, and a licensed psychotherapist with almost 30 years of experience working with individuals and couples. In private practice, she focuses on helping people of all ages, orientations, and genders find love, healing, and passion. In addition to this, Dr. Nelson teaches at several universities and is also the host of the podcast, The Trouble with Sex, and the author of many books, including When You're The One Who Cheats.

Sponsor for this episode...

This episode is brought to you by Marie Murphy PhD Relationship Coaching.

Dr. Marie Murphy provides shame-free, blame-free, and non-judgmental relationship coaching. She draws from different philosophical traditions and approaches in order to better understand the human condition and the different types of professional assistance that can be germane to people in complicated relationship situations.

To learn more about and her relationship coaching practice, visit www.mariemurphyphd.com today and schedule an introductory coaching session with Dr. Marie Murphy to begin the process of resolving your infidelity situation in a way that's truly right for you.

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