103: Dealing with a Vindictive Affair Partner

Aug 23, 2022

Sometimes, two people will be having an affair, and one member of the affair couple will want to end the relationship. However, they’ll hesitate because they’re afraid that if they break it off, their affair partner will call their spouse and tell on them, engage in a nuclear-scale defamation campaign by taking out a full-page ad in a national newspaper calling them a philanderer, or anything in between.

It’s a tale as old as time. The fear of having these secrets exposed keeps them in the affair, or at least serves as a handy excuse for not ending the affair. But the truth is, humans do some pretty crazy things to avoid excruciating emotion, and this leads to unnecessary suffering being imposed upon yourself. So, if you’re dealing with a vindictive affair partner and you’re spinning and indulging in the terrifying possible consequences, this episode is for you.

Pain and suffering may be inevitable parts of the human experience. But when we can learn to deal with our discomfort differently, we can eliminate unnecessary suffering. So, tune in this week to discover how to deal with a vindictive affair partner, and how to use your thinking to get clear on what exactly it is you’re afraid of, how likely it is that your fears will be realized, and how you would proceed if you didn’t feel so freaked out about the situation becoming volatile.

If you’re ready to take this topic deeper in a confidential and compassionate environment, you can schedule an introductory coaching session with me by clicking here!


What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

  • Why we take actions from states of emotional discomfort that, in retrospect, we’re often not proud of.

  • Where to look to understand when you are in pain and see how the way you’re acting might be perpetuating your pain.

  • How making decisions from a place of emotional discomfort doesn’t make you a bad person, but we tell ourselves it does.

  • Why pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

  • How to see where you’re stuck in your own pain and fear, failing to recognize and embrace your imperfect humanness.

  • The difference between not indulging in pain and suffering versus not allowing it to be part of the human condition.

  • Where your power lies in this situation where you’re worried about your affair partner having a meltdown if you break it off.

  • My 7 pieces of guidance for anyone dealing with a vindictive affair partner.

Listen to the Full Episode:


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