Marie Murphy
108: Why Do People Cheat?
Updated: Nov 16, 2022

Some people are very preoccupied, perhaps even obsessed, with the question of why people cheat. People always want to know, “Okay, so what’s really going on with the person who’s cheating?” Other times, people are curious about the patterns of people who cheat, and in a way, these sound like potentially interesting questions to answer. But are they helpful questions?
The matter of infidelity is so loaded, and these questions reflect a common fear that people have of being cheated on, coming from the widespread idea that cheating is objectively very bad in every way. These questions also assume there is an individual reason why each person cheats, like they’re a narcissist or a sociopath, which isn’t necessarily the case.
With all of this in mind, Dr. Marie Murphy is here to show you why, although every single person is responsible for their actions, nobody acts in a vacuum. Social conditions create the context in which cheating happens, so you’ll learn about the circumstances that make it more likely that cheating could occur, and how these structures come up against individual agency.
If you’re ready to take this topic deeper in a confidential and compassionate environment, you can schedule an introductory coaching session with me by clicking here!
What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
Why so many people are genuinely afraid of being cheated on.
2 reasons why finding explanations in individual responsibility and fault bring solace to most people.
Why all humans are individually responsible for their actions, but that doesn’t mean other factors aren’t at play.
What society has taught us about romanticizing monogamous relationships.
How certain societal constructs are set up to make cheating more likely in some scenarios than others.
Why people get caught in a web of the competing forces of societal structure and agency.
Everything society doesn’t teach us about relationships, marriage, divorce, infidelity, and individual agency.
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
Schedule an introductory coaching session with Dr. Marie Murphy to begin the process of resolving your infidelity situation in a way that's truly right for you.
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