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  • Writer's pictureMarie Murphy

14: So You Were Cheated On—Now What?

Updated: Nov 15, 2022


Suzannah Weiss

Dr. Marie Murphy is a Relationship Coach, specializing in helping people who are having affairs make decisions on how to move forward—without judgment. She has a Ph.D. in Sociology with an emphasis in Sexuality from the University of California, San Diego, and has been teaching sex education since her high school years. Dr. Murphy is also a yoga instructor and has previously taught meditation.




Here’s a glimpse of what you’ll learn:

  • Dr. Marie Murphy shares her definition of emotions and the paradox that they present

  • What causes us to feel emotional: our experiences or our thoughts?

  • How letting go of the idea that your partner has to make you happy can lead to a healthier relationship

  • Dr. Murphy shares a hard truth: it is not your job to prevent your partner from feeling emotional about your affair

  • The importance of taking responsibility for your own feelings

  • Dr. Murphy’s advice to people who are dealing with a partner who has cheated

  • The three kinds of business in life—and the one that leads to freedom

In this episode…

Have you ever felt responsible for your partner’s feelings? When they’re reacting to something you’ve done, it can be hard not to feel like it’s your job to make them feel better. But, guess what: someone else’s emotions are not under your control—nor should they be.


According to Dr. Marie Murphy, taking responsibility for your feelings, and your feelings alone, is an essential step in building a healthy relationship—or dealing with the aftermath of an affair. As she says, there is only one path to freedom, and it involves taking ownership of your individual emotions, behavior, and business.


In this episode of Your Secret is Safe with Me, Dr. Marie Murphy sits down with John Corcoran of Rise25 to talk about the reality of infidelity. Together, they discuss the different emotions you may feel as a result of being cheated on, what to let go of in pursuit of a healthier relationship, and why your partner’s feelings aren’t your responsibility—but being considerate is. Keep listening.

Resources Mentioned in this episode

Sponsor for this episode...


This episode is brought to you by Marie Murphy PhD Relationship Coaching.


Dr. Marie Murphy provides shame-free, blame-free, and non-judgmental relationship coaching. She draws from different philosophical traditions and approaches in order to better understand the human condition and the different types of professional assistance that can be germane to people in complicated relationship situations.


To learn more about and her relationship coaching practice, visit www.mariemurphyphd.com today and schedule an introductory coaching session with Dr. Marie Murphy to begin the process of resolving your infidelity situation in a way that's truly right for you.

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