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  • Writer's pictureMarie Murphy

115: From an Affair to a Non-Affair Relationship

Your Secret Is Safe With Me with Dr. Marie Murphy | Is Monogamy (Un)Natural?

Is it true that relationships that start out as an affair simply can’t work out in the long term? The language we use around infidelity can be very loaded. As a result, a lot of people believe, at least on some level of consciousness, that relationships that start out as affairs are doomed to fail. Dr. Marie Murphy hears this all the time from her clients, but that doesn’t make it an objective fact.

Humans love black-and-white thinking in all areas of life. People often just think infidelity is categorically bad, with no room for context or nuance. But the world is complex, and while taking your relationship from an affair to a non-affair relationship is going to throw up some challenges, it definitely isn’t impossible.

Tune in this week to discover what you’re trying to avoid by telling yourself you can’t transition from an affair into a non-affair or “normal” relationship. Dr. Marie Murphy is sharing how believing that your relationship simply can’t work is impacting how you’re showing up in that relationship, and how to instead pursue your relationship your way, even if it means uncertainty and vulnerability along the way.

If you’re ready to take this topic deeper in a confidential and compassionate environment, you can schedule an introductory coaching session with Dr. Marie Murphy by clicking here!


What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

  • The extent of the antipathy that we have, as a society, toward infidelity and how humans try to impose order on the complex chaos of the human experience.

  • One question to ask yourself if you think a relationship that begins as an affair is doomed to fail.

  • The illusion of protection, certainty, or control you’re trying to create when you believe that transitioning into a non-affair relationship is impossible.

  • Why, whether you think you can or can’t transition your affair relationship into a non-affair relationship, your actions will prove you right.

  • Some examples of affairs turning into long-lasting, loving, non-affair relationships, and why you don’t need this proof to make it your reality.

  • Why you get to define what constitutes “success” in your relationships.

  • How to get clear on your thoughts and start believing it’s possible for you to transition your affair relationship into a fulfilling and “successful” non-affair relationship.

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