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  • Writer's pictureMarie Murphy

74: Dealing With Guilt and Shame

Updated: Nov 16, 2022

Dr. Marie Murphy

Dr. Marie Murphy is a relationship coach specializing in helping people who are having affairs make decisions on how to move forward — without judgment. She has a Ph.D. in sociology with an emphasis in sexuality from the University of California, San Diego, and has been teaching sex education since her high school years. Dr. Murphy is also a yoga instructor and has previously taught meditation.

Here’s a glimpse of what you’ll learn:

  • Why perspective is important to minimize feelings of guilt and shame

  • Dr. Marie Murphy debunks the myths around guilt and shame as motivators

  • How can you move towards self-acceptance, self-love, and self-respect?

  • Identifying the thoughts that are generating feelings of guilt and shame

  • How to find relief from negative feelings: acknowledge what you like — and don’t like — about your situation

In this episode…

Infidelity often brings forth feelings of guilt and shame, but it shouldn’t lead you to believe you’re a bad person. You don’t have to convince yourself that cheating is good — but it doesn’t have to be a bad thing, either. So how can you minimize feelings of guilt and shame and move towards self-acceptance, self-respect, and self-love?

In order to shift your relationship with guilt and shame, you have to be willing to endure these feelings when they arise. Instead of trying to avoid these feelings or make them go away, Dr. Marie Murphy suggests you ride out the sensations. It takes practice to embrace the discomfort, but consciously experiencing guilt and shame without reacting is vital for self-acceptance. It allows you to recognize the negative thoughts floating through your mind, get out of the shame spiral, and work towards change that you’ll feel good about in the long term.

In this episode of Your Secret is Safe With Me, Dr. Marie Murphy discusses strategies for dealing with guilt and shame. She shares why guilt and shame aren’t motivators of sustainable positive change, the three steps for managing these negative feelings, and how to shift internalized beliefs so you can make room for self-love and acceptance.

Resources Mentioned in this episode

Sponsor for this episode...

This episode is brought to you by Marie Murphy Ph.D. Relationship Coaching.

Dr. Marie Murphy provides shame-free, blame-free, and non-judgmental relationship coaching. She draws from different philosophical traditions and approaches in order to better understand the human condition and the different types of professional assistance that can be germane to people in complicated relationship situations.

To learn more about her and her relationship coaching practice, visit today and schedule an introductory coaching session with Dr. Marie Murphy to begin the process of resolving your infidelity situation in a way that's truly right for you.


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